“I only date my friends” huh???

The thing I love about girl talk is that it offers such fertile ground for the study of practical ethics with case law a mile long and the universality of its wisdom is impressive because I’ve actually had girl talk with guys and I know for a fact men also have ‘girl talk’ and really if you think about it its subject matter is relevant to just about everyone.
So I was beyond shocked when I heard this new rule of not dating anyone but your friends. I mean I’ve been around the block and I have heard just about every rule there is, whether it is no sex before marriage, I don’t date married men, love is love so everything goes this particular rule had glistening novel appeal to me.
The woman who abides by it isn’t even a friend (again another great part of girl talk it can be had with strangers on the deepest of issues) but I just had to uncover the philosophy behind it.
She told me that after working on a work project with her boyfriend of long standing she literally had to let him go to avoid hating and resenting him. That affirmed to her that the hardest union yet is a merging of minds, ideas and personality the merging in sex and shallow conversations though awkward as hell is actually the easy part. And she knows full well that she is to blame for the break up because two people can’t be too different to be together , breaking up is never about the difference between you two it’s about the indifference between you ,the choice to not try and unwillingness to not accommodate for each other’s kinks and mishaps. And she reckons the devastation she felt the moment she stopped trying.
However, she also said that though it is hard it is the most fulfilling union and once you get to the other side it all makes sense and you realize the betterment it has done to you. That having been said she now wants to do the hard part beforehand and avoid all the messiness of starting with the easy part and since friendship is all about platonic fusion of principles, ideals, personalities and all the immaterialness of the mind that’s her preferred starting point.
I featured this very train of thought in one of my truth aspirins, ‘relationships are just more complex versions friendships’. Although it sounded logical enough what about all the interesting/handsome/pretty/peculiar strangers we meet every day who spell intriguing and alluring destinies to us .I did wonder though does the formula actually really help(change anything) or is it just an efficient means to meet a mate or none of the above?


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